my healing journey : Step : 13.07.2022 …

My Healing Journey 13.07.2022 …

Active Stabilisation Session (10) …

I pre-booked this session the minute we finished the Active Stabilisation Session (9) …, working it around YFC_J availability as he seems to be so much busier these days.

I am still learning so much new information and new skills, not so much last. But, I am very eager to keep trying with this part of the programme.

Preparation & Setting Up …

As soon as the session was over I received the details for my next appointment. We are still sticking with landline telephone calls for now.

What’s New …

Since my last session with YFC_J, I have been working hard on the following areas. Firstly, on dealing with my bowel and digestive issues. Secondly, looking in to accessing a low dose beta blocker. Thirdly, eating much less and smaller sized meals. Fourthly, spending a good two to four weeks in bed.

The bowel issue, I already have booked an appointment.

The beta blocker appointment is coming soon; it’s definitely on my plan for this session gap.

The smaller meals is easy when my stomach is bad but when I begin to feel even the slightest bit better I am afraid I revert back to type. Eat a lot.

Staying in bed for a complete month will be very hard to do. Who will care for me? Hi will make my morning drink when I need it? Who will get my food when I’m hungry? I am not sure this is possible unless I go into hospice or hospital care.

…

What’s Important …

I have some things that I need to do before our next appointment so that I can get some momentum and hopefully keep it going. 

Things I’d like to achieve during the next few weeks:

• • get an appointment for bowel and digestive issues ✔️ 
  • get beta blockers ✔️
  • get anti histamines ✔️ 
  • spend a complete month in bed ✖️

How / What Have I Been Doing Since My Last Session …

…

#week 1 (23.05.2022-29.05.2022) : I got straight off my previous appointment and rang the GP. I book my annual bloods and pre-booked an appointment to discuss the bowel and digestive issues with a proviso that should it become more severe I will ring at 08:00 in the morning for an urgent appointment. I feel like this is an achievement and I want to keep the momentum going by maybe ringing next week, (I actually rang 27.05.2022) and was to told to fill in an online request and now I have an appointment for Monday, which is actually extremely good considering last week I rang and could only get the first week in June for my bowel issue), for a pre-booked appointment to discuss my high heart rate and access to beta blockers.

#week 2 (30.05.2022-05.06.2022) : 30.05.22 : today was my GP appointment to discuss low dose beta blockers for POTS symptoms … I was very nervous about it. Firstly, because I feel like a druggie (no particular reason other than I hate taking tablets). And secondly, because I used to work at our local surgery and the GP I was speaking to was known to me; known as a lovely colleague but less so lovely as a GP. No worries necessary, she was extremely gentle and kind. YaaaY … I have beta blockers at 10 mg, to start at 5 mg and work up to 10 mg over the course of two weeks and then if no relief is gain I am to add another 5 mg, over the following two weeks, until I reach 20 mg. However, if I get relief then I am to stop at that dosage; hopefully it will be at 10 mg, no higher. 30.05.22 : I didn’t take the beta blocker as I felt too anxious; I forgive myself … will try again. 31.05.22 : I took the beta blocker 1/2 a tablet as required, which is only 5 mg, and I was fine except for insomnia and feeling like I had an allergy … let’s see what happens as the build in my system …

#week 3 (06.06.2022-12.06.2022) : 06.06.22 : bloods appointment … 07.06.22 : bowel and digestive issues GP appointment …

#week 4 (13.06.2022-19.06.2022) : …

#week 5 (20.06.2022-26.06.2022) : …

#week 6 (27.06.2022-03.07.2022) : aiming to spend this week completely in bed …

#week 7 (04.07.2022-10.07.2022) : aiming to spend this week completely in bed …

#week 8 (11.07.2022-17.07.2022) : …

Well, …

The Active Stabilisation Session (10) …

The session really was me explaining everything that has happened. I don’t feel that I have YFC_J support right now. I believe the reason is linked closely wi5 my inability to implement his suggestions and I totally get where he’s coming from too.

After The Active Stabilisation Session …

I cried …

The Here & Now …

Still crying because I’m useless … this illness makes me fragmented and unreliable …

The Day After …

Heavy hearted …

What Next …

Try harder next month or two. We have left a two month gap between appointments to see if I am able to implement anything during that time.

I will document as much information as I can in the next blog post in ‘my healing journey’. Please be aware that any information I share will always follow data protection guidelines and will never be enough for you to substitute it for your own programme

Can You Help With Costs …

Please go to my ‘fund my healing journey …’ page to donate.

 fragmented.ME xXx