fragmented.ME …
catch up ...

catch up : 03.05.2021 …

Reading time: 13 Minutes

Fortnightly Catch Up 03.05.2021 …

Welcome to the latest catch up instalment.

I know I don’t do that much but I have enjoyed doing these so far. They’ve helped me realise and accept a bit more just how poorly I am and just how cathartic writing is.

So without any further ado let’s get on with this!

Don’t forget whenever you see MiA … it means I have been unable to journal anything on that day due to serious illness or just because I was unable to do anything, except keep my head above water, on that particular day.

What’s New …

At the start of this fortnight’s catch up I am really poorly and not recovering very well from my dental extractions. I ended up with dry socket and a small infection and so lots more extra pain to deal with.

After my assessment on 27.04.2021 I am hoping to at least get some real guidance on potential POTS and other related issues, and maybe even some better pain management.

My husband got taken in to hospital (read below for the details – Thursday of week two) …

What’s Important …

Every day is a new day to see your surroundings with different eyes. I took these photographs below, the morning of Friday 16.04.2021, two days after my dental extractions, when I was in severe all over body pain and simply trying to find peace in my surroundings. I wondered around our garden and took a few snapshots. These are some of them.

#FromMyGarden 16.04.2021 ...

Diary (19.04.2021-02.05.2021)

Monday …


I am very much missing from everything right now. Those who follow my catch ups will know on the Wednesday just gone I had two dental extractions and they triggered my TMJ or my trigeminal neuralgia or even both. I am in so much pain I can barely think. So, for the next few days until I feel much better than this I have decided to just post a picture taken from one of our windows.

#FromMyDoor 16.04.2021 ...

Tuesday …


I have to go back to the dentist. I have had so much pain. I am almost certain it’s TMJ or trigeminal neuralgia triggered by the dental treatment. But, my husband says I smell funny and I can also taste a funny taste too, so we have to return to be sure.

Except, for my initial experience with TMJ and / or TN I’ve never had such extreme facial pain. It’s excruciating and I feel so unable to cope with it, despite my prior experiences with this and also having daily pain. This pain is on another level …

I’ve been to the dentist. I have got dry socket and a little bit of infection. So the dentist cleaned it out and packed it with this medicated fill. It looked like a dead fly and tastes like disinfectant. Not that I’ve ever tasted disinfectant but from the smell we all have an idea what it might taste like.

Anyway, it’s just disgusting and I feel rather poorly. I’m off to rest now!

#InMyGarden 16.04.2021 ...

 Wednesday …


#InMyGarden 16.04.2021 ...

Thursday …


#InMyGarden 16.04.2021 ...

Friday …


#InMyGarden 16.04.2021 ...

Saturday …

MiA … I am sorry for my continued absence. I have been extremely unwell following these dental extractions. That said, I do feel a tad better today, but I am taking the active resting right through to Monday. See you soon x

#InMyGarden 16.04.2021 ...

Sunday …


#InMyGarden 16.04.2021 ...

Monday …

I am still not back to my previous levels of illness but today is the start of things. I’m having a much needed bath and hair wash and clean PJs in preparation for tomorrow. That’s it, that’s all I can manage. Well actually I can’t manage that much but I want to feel cleaner than I do.

My husband seems to have forgotten he was attending the assessment as well tomorrow. Typical. It happens all the time. But guess what? I’m not that bothered anyway. I’m more than happy to go this alone, I always have and always will. Well I don’t really get much of a choice do I?

I can recall so many doctors appointments and consultant appointments that I’ve told him about and he didn’t even bother to ask how they went. I know he’s busy working. But, he does have very deaf ears when it suits him. But me too … I can play that game as well.

It lets me know where I stand in the scheme of things. Actually where I have always stood. Likewise …

Well, F you, F you, F you, very very much … I know I might sound really catty but we’ve been married a very long time and I’ve never really had much emotional support or help with the kids. I guess he could say the same about me financially. So as a team we would probably work really well. But sometimes it does get to me. It has taken lockdown for him to realise just how poorly I actually am, but we can move on from this, we can move forward and I have to admit since seeing, and accepting, how poorly I am he has become a lot more physically supportive and tries very hard to be understanding of how I might be feeling.

Tuesday …

Today was my ‘assessment & formulation’ appointment 

Big sighing breathe out …

I want to be honest with you friends and I have woken with a major migraine.

WTF and why?

The only thing I can think of is food. Yesterday, I ate Indian (with the chunks of chicken picked out). I still can’t chew because my mouth is so painful so I’m sticking with soft foods. The husband had bought me a bacon pasta, with loads of chewy fatty and stringy bits of bacon in. No way could I eat that. The other option was pasta spinach. Still too chewy and stringy (we ate this meal tonight and it wasn’t actually chewy or stringy at all so I could have had that). Really, it’s that bad. The pain in unbearable and over two weeks on my mouth hasn’t healed any and is worse than the day I had the extractions. So the final meal he bought was Indian. At least I could pick out the whole pieces of chicken. But I know Indian food doesn’t like me. So why did I eat it. Why do I keep ignoring what I I know.

I woke at 04:00, got my ice hat, took a syndol and a cocodamol, and went back to sleep. Woke again at 06:00, got a new ice hat, and took three aspirin, and went back to a very disturbed sleep. I then woke again at 08:00 and came downstairs. I closed all the blinds and opened a patio door to keep the lounge dark and cool. It’s been very bright and warm in Cumbria of late and I need to feel cool and cosseted by the dark too. I also cannot do my meeting in a stuffy and bright room.

Please, please, if there’s a god up there, help me be well enough for this appointment at 13:00. Otherwise, it’s just a waste of money, which is another reason I wanted to go through the NHS. I can’t afford this and I can’t afford to be under financial pressure to be well for the day of each carefully booked appointment.

I had the appointment. It went very well and you can read about it using the ‘assessment & formulation’ link above.

Wednesday …

Bad headache. Feeling unwell. Dental extractions have flared up again and really don’t seem to be healing properly. So, I had to return to the dentist, who popped the infection, cleaned out the hole and put another ‘dead fly’ (medicated packing) in (this is in the upper extraction, the previous ‘dead fly’ went into the very back lower extraction). I have to now go back in a week for him to keep a check on them.

I’m back home now. Face throbbing. Feeling super sorry for myself.

By 18:00 I had developed a severe unusual headache and took three different kinds of pain medications and went to bed to have a painful and fitful sleep.

Thursday …

PLEASE NOTE: this diary entry and the following two, specifically the parts about new clothes were pre-planned prior to my husband getting sick. I don’t have the health or energy to remove them, even though I do feel they are far less appropriate now, considering my husbands illness. But because of my own ill health, I am going to have leave them in here. I only planned the clothing share over these few days to fill in my diary. I did, however, actually buy these all clothes last week.

new PJs ...

I got some new PJs in the M & S online sale …

These PJ, I’ve had before from the last season, and they are super comfy, cheap and often on offer. I got two pairs in each pattern. So, I now have nine pairs of PJs, that I can wear through the year. It will also allow me to change my PJs daily, if I am physically well enough, instead of every other day. I bought a size bigger this time as the reviews suggested they were on the small size and I really like my PJs baggy and loose.

Health wise, I woke with the same dreadful weird headache after a very disturbed and painful night. I think it’s a reaction to the clove oil in the medicated dressing. So, I stayed in bed all day.

My husband has had some health issues recently and he had to go to hospital today. He’s never ever been ill since I’ve known him. But since having the covid vaccine he’s just not been right. So I am at home worrying about him. Sat there worrying, I get a phone call from an unknown number and almost die thinking it was the hospital about my husband.

But relief, it was my specialist headache clinic ringing me. I had an appointment I’d forgotten about. It was a very long and convoluted appointment from someone new trying to feel their way with someone who is almost 59 years of age with severe ME and really doesn’t need the hassle.

Husband update: They’re keep my husband in hospital to do an angiogram and for that he needs to be moved to Carlisle (50 miles from us). And so I have to get a taxi to the not so local hospital (£40), take him some clothes and and bring the car home. I will also have to collect him from Carlisle. That is going to be hard.

After doing this I have really serious pain in my upper back and my head hurts more than ever. I have also sweated so much I have to have a bath. After my bath I go to bed and cry. I’m so poorly and my husband is the only carer I have.

Tonight I have become acutely aware of how much I need him, of how very alone I am.

Friday …

PLEASE NOTE: this diary entry and the previous one and the following one, specifically the parts about new clothes were pre-planned prior to my husband getting sick. I don’t have the health or energy to remove them, even though I do feel they are far less appropriate now, considering my husbands illness. But because of my own ill health, I am going to have leave them in here. I only planned the clothing share over these few days to fill in my diary. I did, however, actually buy these all clothes last week.

new sweatshirts ...

I got some new Lucy & Yak sweatshirts.

Gorgeous aren’t they?

Lucy & Yak are not cheap, but they are a small ethical UK brand that I like to buy from, when I can.

Because I really like their style and their ethics too.

Prior to getting severely poorly I bought their dungarees and their short dungarees. Then when I got a bit sicker and couldn’t iron my clothes any longer I bought their leggings, which are well made and comfy, but expensive for leggings. As well, every single t-shirt I own is a Lucy & Yak tee and now I have these three gorgeous sweatshirts to add to my Lucy & Yak collection.

I used to buy my sweatshirts from Joules but have swapped to Lucy & Yak because I want to support small businesses with ethical processes in place.

I love a sweatshirt / cardigan over my PJ in case I get cold or if I go in the garden, which is rare these days, or I even have to go in the car.

Health wise, I’m am so poorly I’ve no idea how I will get downstairs never mind drive to Carlisle for my husband. It’s 03:00 and I’m in so much pain I all I can do is cry gently and I do, I just let the tears flow.

Better out than in my husband would say …

Husband update: He’s still in hospital and hasn’t been moved overnight to Carlisle yet. They have no beds. We have no family or friends who can help. I am well aware today of how alone we are. How much I need my husband. How isolated I really am. I’m slightly relieved they didn’t move him overnight and I’m hoping that it’s not until tomorrow but by tomorrow his underwear / clothes I took him and our food at home has ran out and prior to last night it’s been over two years since I’ve driven and since I’ve been food shopping. When I feel a bit better I’m going to do an online food shop.

Husband update: this has to be the biggest shock ever. He had his angiogram today and they’ve said he may need stents but it could be much worse and he could need a bypass. They will move him to Carlisle as soon as possible so that they can do a different kind of angiogram that tells them more and will allow stents to be inserted there and then if needed. It is so shocking, I can hardly believe it, and I’m absolutely gutted. This is my husband the healthiest person I know. WTAF …

Saturday …

PLEASE NOTE: this diary entry and the previous two, specifically the parts about new clothes were pre-planned prior to my husband getting sick. I don’t have the health or energy to remove them, even though I do feel they are far less appropriate now, considering my husbands illness. But because of my own ill health, I am going to have leave them in here. I only planned the clothing share over these few days to fill in my diary. I did, however, actually buy these all clothes last week.

Miranda Hart ...

OK bear with … I seem to be on a spending spree.

Two new pairs of Miranda PJs and a Miranda ‘bear with’ face mask …

I am in love …

The pink PJs say ‘behold my allure’ and the blue PJs say ‘uniquely me’, they both have a matching eye mask and storage bag. I really am so in love …

Husband update: he was transferred to another hospital last night and had a different exploratory angiogram and he has a severe blockage, an almost flattened vein. It’s a 95% blockage and it cannot be treated via stents, he has to have a bypass. He will be transferred again to a heart specialist hospital and have the bypass. We don’t know when but he is not allowed home as he could have a fatal heart attack at any moment and so he will be treated as urgent.

Sunday …

MiA major migraine …

PLEASE NOTE: from here on none of the diary has been preplanned and so you will get it as it happened or possibly a day or two later.

At 23:15 the hospital, where my husband has been moved to in order to have the bypass, have had a very long chat with him. Although, they wanted to do the operation tomorrow, because of the medications the two previous hospitals have given him to thin his blood, just in case it was a clot, it means that he has to wait seven days before the operation can safely be done. Otherwise, there is a good chance he could bleed to death because they were blood thinner medications. He will also have to have a double bypass (a fairly new method will be used, which takes longer and more skill, but is safer and cuts healing time). So we are looking at him being back home in about another 12-15 days.

The month of May is also ME awareness month and I had a few things planned. Some of these are blog posts that have already been completed and scheduled so will automatically post on the website. However, others were not complete and I’m not quite sure if I will be able to finish them too.

I will have to play this by ear, day by day. As an ME patient this is what we are good at, letting things go, not getting upset about it, and playing life by ear, day by day, and often minute by minute.

That said, please do keep coming back and checking and also remember that I am fundraising for the ME Trust UK starting on 12th of May and for ten months in total too. As well, instead of reading a book a month, as I had previously planned, I may have to turn each one into listening to the audio version of that book. Everything will be clarified, just probably on a very ‘ here and now’ basis.

* just a reminder that I am fundraising for The ME Trust UK as part of ME awareness 2021. I am going to read 10 books in 10 months and document them on the ‘ten books in ten months …’  blog page.

Please click the link above to read more about this and to also donate and help me raise as much money as we can to The ME Trust UK.

 fragmented.ME xXx

Last Updated on 12/05/2022 by fragmented_ME

Let’s us know what you think and help us do better ...

fragmented.ME news ...
fragmented.ME news ...

Oh hi there 👋
It’s nice to meet you.

Sign up to receive a notification each time we post new content ...

(usually twice a week, but this will be no more than three times a week)

Read our privacy policy for more info.


My birth name is Denise, but I’m know as Bella to those who love me. I have a first class honours degree in education & psychology and a strong passion to keep learning and educating others ... I have severe ME/CFS and lots of other chronic illnesses and I started this blog as an expansion to my instagram page, where I advocate for chronic illness. I am married and have two grown up boys, or should I say young men. I have three gorgeous grandchildren, one boy and two girls. And despite being chronically sick and housebound I am mostly happy. 🥰

Don`t copy text!

Your message has been successfully sent

Unable to send.



ME Awareness Month 2022

read what I’m doing & what you could do

what ME is to me …

newsletter (subscribe) ...

Please use this form if you would like to get notified when we update or add new blogs. You’ll hear from us soon!

If you have any other suggestions for ‘anything’ you would like me to write about or if you would like to contribute your own piece to fragmented.ME, please contact me using this contact form.

Leave this field blank
Please put your full & real name here ...
Please put your full & real name here ...

... share this page ...

10 steps to practicing Radical Acceptance
according to DBT’s founder, Marsha Linehan:


1.  Observe that you are questioning or fighting reality (“it shouldn’t be this way”)

2.  Remind yourself that the unpleasant reality is just as it is and cannot be changed (“this is what happened”)

3.  Remind yourself that there are causes for the reality (“this is how things happened”)

4.  Practice accepting with your whole self (mind, body, spirit) - Use accepting self-talk, relaxation techniques, mindfulness and/or imagery

5.  List all of the behaviors you would engage in if you did accept the facts and then engage in those behaviors as if you have already accepted the facts

6.  Imagine, in your mind’s eye, believing what you do not want to accept and rehearse in your mind what you would do if you accepted what seems unacceptable

7.  Attend to body sensations as you think about what you need to accept

8.  Allow disappointment, sadness or grief to arise within you

9.  Acknowledge that life can be worth living even when there is pain

10.  Do pros and cons if you find yourself resisting practicing acceptance

Logo of ijpsych

2009 Oct-Dec; 51(4): 239–241.
doi: 10.4103/0019-5545.58285: 10.4103/0019-5545.58285
PMCID: PMC2802367
PMID: 20048445

The biochemistry of belief

Address for correspondence: Dr. TS Sathyanarayana Rao, Department of Psychiatry, JSS University, JSS Medical College Hospital, M.G. Road, Mysore - 570 004, India. E-mail: moc.oohay@91oarsst
This is an open-access article distributed under the terms of the Creative Commons Attribution License, which permits unrestricted use, distribution, and reproduction in any medium, provided the original work is properly cited.

“Man is what he believes”

Anton Chekhov

Beliefs are basically the guiding principles in life that provide direction and meaning in life. Beliefs are the preset, organized filters to our perceptions of the world (external and internal). Beliefs are like ‘Internal commands’ to the brain as to how to represent what is happening, when we congruently believe something to be true. In the absence of beliefs or inability to tap into them, people feel disempowered.

Beliefs originate from what we hear - and keep on hearing from others, ever since we were children (and even before that!). The sources of beliefs include environment, events, knowledge, past experiences, visualization etc. One of the biggest misconceptions people often harbor is that belief is a static, intellectual concept. Nothing can be farther from truth! Beliefs are a choice. We have the power to choose our beliefs. Our beliefs become our reality.

Beliefs are not just cold mental premises, but are ‘hot stuff’ intertwined with emotions (conscious or unconscious). Perhaps, that is why we feel threatened or react with sometimes uncalled for aggression, when we believe our beliefs are being challenged! Research findings have repeatedly pointed out that the emotional brain is no longer confined to the classical locales of the hippocampus, amygdala and hypothalamus.[1] The sensory inputs we receive from the environment undergo a filtering process as they travel across one or more synapses, ultimately reaching the area of higher processing, like the frontal lobes. There, the sensory information enters our conscious awareness. What portion of this sensory information enters is determined by our beliefs. Fortunately for us, receptors on the cell membranes are flexible, which can alter in sensitivity and conformation. In other words, even when we feel stuck ‘emotionally’, there is always a biochemical potential for change and possible growth. When we choose to change our thoughts (bursts of neurochemicals!), we become open and receptive to other pieces of sensory information hitherto blocked by our beliefs! When we change our thinking, we change our beliefs. When we change our beliefs, we change our behavior.

A mention of the ‘Placebo’ is most appropriate at this juncture. Medical history is replete with numerous reported cases where placebos were found to have a profound effect on a variety of disorders. One such astounding case was that of a woman suffering from severe nausea and vomiting. Objective measurements of her gastric contractions indicated a disrupted pattern matching the condition she complained of. Then a ‘new, magical, extremely potent’ drug was offered to her, which would, the doctors proclaimed, undoubtedly cure her nausea. Within a few minutes, her nausea vanished! The very same gastric tests now revealed normal pattern, when, in actuality, she had been given syrup of ipecac, a substance usually used to induce nausea! When the syrup was presented to her, paired with the strong suggestion of relief of nausea, by an authority figure, it acted as a (command) message to the brain that triggered a cascade of self-regulatory biochemical responses within the body.[2] This instance dramatically demonstrates that the influence of placebo could be more potent than expected drug effect.

An important observation was that, part of the placebo response seemed to involve the meaning of the disorder or the illness to the individual. In other words, the person's belief or how she/he interprets (inter-presents or internally represents) directly governs the biological response or behavior. Another remarkable study involved a schizophrenic. This woman was observed to have split personality. Under normal conditions, her blood glucose levels were normal. However, the moment she believed she was diabetic, her entire physiology changed to become that of a diabetic, including elevated blood glucose levels.[3]

Suggestions or symbolic messages shape beliefs that in turn affect our physical well being. Several cases of ‘Disappearance of warts’ have been reported by Ornstein and Sobel wherein they ponder on how the brain translates the suggestions (sometimes using hypnosis) into systematic biochemical battle strategies such as chemical messengers sent to enlist the aid of immune cells in an assault on the microbe-induced miniature tumor or probably small arteries are selectively constricted, cutting off the vital nutrient supply to warts but not touching the neighboring healthy cells.[2]

Findings of carefully designed research indicate that our interpretation of what we are seeing (experiencing) can literally alter our physiology. In fact, all symptoms of medicine work through our beliefs. By subtly transforming the unknown (disease/disorder) into something known, named, tamed and explained, alarm reactions in the brain can be calmed down. All therapies have a hidden, symbolic value and influence on the psyche, besides the direct specific effect they may have on the body.

Just as amazingly life-affirming placebos are, the reverse, “Nocebo' has been observed to be playing its part too. It is associated with negative, life-threatening or disempowering beliefs. Arthur Barsky, a psychiatrist states that it is the patient's expectations – beliefs whether a drug or procedure works or will have side effects – that plays a crucial role in the outcome.[4]

The biochemistry of our body stems from our awareness.[5] Belief-reinforced awareness becomes our biochemistry. Each and every tiny cell in our body is perfectly and absolutely aware of our thoughts, feelings and of course, our beliefs. There is a beautiful saying ‘Nobody grows old. When people stop growing, they become old’. If you believe you are fragile, the biochemistry of your body unquestionably obeys and manifests it. If you believe you are tough (irrespective of your weight and bone density!), your body undeniably mirrors it. When you believe you are depressed (more precisely, when you become consciously aware of your ‘Being depressed’), you stamp the raw data received through your sense organs, with a judgment – that is your personal view – and physically become the ‘interpretation’ as you internalize it. A classic example is ‘Psychosocial dwarfism’, wherein children who feel and believethat they are unloved, translate the perceived lack of love into depleted levels of growth hormone, in contrast to the strongly held view that growth hormone is released according to a preprogrammed schedule coded into the individual's genes!

Providing scientific evidence to support a holistic approach to well being and healthcare, Bruce Lipton sheds light on mechanism underlying healing at cellular level. He emphasizes that ‘love’ is the most healing emotion and ‘placebo’ effect accounts for a substantial percentage of any drug's action, underscoring the significance of beliefs in health and sickness. According to him, as adults, we still believe in and act our lives out based on information we absorbed as children (pathetic indeed!). And the good news is, we can do something about the ‘tape’ our subconscious mind is playing (ol' silly beliefs) and change them NOW.[6] Further recent literature evidences provided knowledge based on scientific principles of biology of belief. There are limited studies on clinics of traditional beliefs and if we get more scientific data, we can use these traditional systems in clinical mental health management. Human belief system is formed by all the experiences learned and experimented filtered through personality.[7] The senses to capture inner and outer perceptions have higher brain potentials. Some questions that arise in this context are, does the integration and acceptance of these perceptions result in the establishment of beliefs? Does the establishment of these beliefs depend on proof demonstrations? The proofs might be the perceptions, which we can directly see or having scientific proof or custom or faith.[8,9] Beliefs are developed as stimuli received as trusted information and stored in the memory. These perceptions are generalized and established into belief. These beliefs are involved in the moral judgment of the person. Beliefs help in decision-making. Bogousslavsky and Inglin explained that, how some physicians were more successful by taking an account of patient beliefs. Beliefs influence factors involved in the development of psychopathology. They also influence the cognitive and emotional assessment, addictiveness, responses to false positives and persistent normal defensive reactions. Total brain function is required in stabilizing the belief and in responding to environmental system. Some of the brain regions and the neural circuits are very important in establishing beliefs and executing emotions. Frontal lobes play a major role in beliefs. Mental representations of the world are integrated with sub-cortical information by prefrontal cortex. Amygdala and Hippocampus are involved in the process of thinking and thus help in execution of beliefs. NMDA receptor is involved in thinking and in the development of beliefs. These beliefs are subjected to challenge. A belief that is subjected to more challenges becomes stronger. When a new stimulus comes, it creates distress in the brain with already existing patterns. The distress results in the release of dopamine (neurotransmitter) to transmit the signal.[10,11] Research findings of Young and Saxe (2008) revealed that medial prefrontal cortex is involved in processing the belief valence.[12] Right temporoparietal junction and precuneus are involved in the processing of beliefs to moral judgment. True beliefs are processed through right temporoparietal junction.[13,14] Saxe (2006) explained that beliefs judging starts at the age of five years citing example of judging of belief questions on short stories by the children.[15] Belief attribution involved activating regions of medial prefrontal cortex, superior temporal gyri and hippocampal regions. Studies by Krummenacher et al, have shown that dopamine levels are associated with paranormal thoughts suggesting the role of dopamine in belief development in the brain.[16] Flannelly et al, illustrated on how primitive brain mechanisms that evolved to assess environmental threats in related psychiatric disorders.[17] Also were highlighted the issues such as the way beliefs can affect psychiatric symptoms through these brain systems. The theories discussed widely are related to (a) link psychiatric disorders to threat assessment and (b) explain how the normal functioning of threat assessment systems can become pathological. It is proposed that three brain structures are implicated in brain disorders in response to threat assessment and self-defense: the regions are the prefrontal cortex, the basal ganglia and parts of limbic system. The functionality of these regions has great potential to understand mechanism of belief formation and its relevance in neurological functions/dysfunctions. Now it is clear that biology and physiology of belief is an open area for research both at basic and clinical level. The future directions are to develop validated experimental or sound theoretical interpretation to make ‘BELIEF’ as a potential clinical management tool.

Perceptual shifts are the prerequisites for changing the belief and hence changing the biochemistry of our body favorably. Our innate desire and willingness to learn and grow lead to newer perceptions. When we consciously allow newer perceptions to enter the brain by seeking new experiences, learning new skills and changed perspectives, our body can respond in newer ways –this is the true secret of youth. Beliefs (internal representations/interpretations) thus hold the magic wand of remarkable transformations in our biochemical profile. If you are chasing joy and peace all the time everywhere but exclaim exhausted, ‘Oh, it's to be found nowhere!’, why not change your interpretation of NOWHERE to ‘NOW HERE’; just by introducing a gap, you change your awareness – that changes your belief and that changes your biochemistry in an instant!

Everything exists as a ‘Matrix of pure possibilities’ akin to ‘formless’ molten wax or moldable soft clay. We shape them into anything we desire by choosing to do so, prompted, dictated (consciously or unconsciously) by our beliefs. The awareness that we are part of these ever-changing fields of energy that constantly interact with one another is what gives us the key hitherto elusive, to unlock the immense power within us. And it is our awareness of this awesome truth that changes everything. Then we transform ourselves from passive onlookers to powerful creators. Our beliefs provide the script to write or re-write the code of our reality.

Thoughts and beliefs are an integral part of the brain's operations. Neurotransmitters could be termed the ‘words’ brain uses to communicate with exchange of information occurring constantly, mediated by these molecular messengers. Unraveling the mystery of this molecular music induced by the magic of beliefs, dramatically influencing the biochemistry of brain could be an exciting adventure and a worth pursuing cerebral challenge.


1. Candace Pert. Molecules of emotion: Why you feel the way you feel. New York, USA: Scribner Publications; 2003. ISBN-10: 0684846349.
2. Ornstein R, Sobel D. The healing brain: Breakthrough discoveries about how the brain keeps us healthy. USA: Malor Books; 1999. ISBN-10: 1883536170.
3. Robbins A. Unlimited power: The new science of personal excellence. UK: Simon and Schuster; 1986. ISBN 0-7434-0939-6.
4. Braden G. The spontaneous healing of belief. Hay House Publishers (India) Pvt. Ltd; 2008. ISBN 978-81-89988-39-5.
5. Chopra D. Ageless body, timeless mind: The quantum alternative to growing old. Hormony Publishers; 1994. ISBN -10: 0517882124.
6. Lipton B. The biology of belief: Unleashing the power of consciousness, matter and miracles. Mountain of Love Publishers; 2005. ISBN 978-0975991473.
7. Bogousslavsky J, Inglin M. Beliefs and the brain. Eur Neurol. 2007;58:129–32. [PubMed: 17622716]
8. Gundersen L. Faith and healing. Ann Intern Med. 2000;132:169–72. [PubMed: 10644287]
9. Mueller PS, Plevak DJ, Rummans TA. Religious involvement, spirituality, and medicine: Implications for clinical practice. Mayo Clin Proc. 2001;76:1225–35. [PubMed: 11761504]
10. Patel AD, Peretz I, Tramo M, Labreque R. Processing prosodic and musical patterns: A neuropsychological investigation. Brain Lang. 1998;61:123–44. [PubMed: 9448936]
11. Tramo MJ. Biology and music. Music of the hemispheres. Science. 2001;291:54–6. [PubMed: 11192009]
12. Young L, Saxe R. The neural basis of belief encoding and integration in moral judgment. Neuroimage. 2008;40:1912–20. [PubMed: 18342544]
13. Aichhorn M, Perner J, Weiss B, Kronbichler M, Staffen W, Ladurner G. Temporo-parietal junction activity in theory-of-mind tasks: Falseness, beliefs, or attention. J Cogn Neurosci. 2009;21:1179–92. [PubMed: 18702587]
14. Abraham A, Rakoczy H, Werning M, von Cramon DY, Schubotz RI. Matching mind to world and vice versa: Functional dissociations between belief and desire mental state processing. Soc Neurosci. 2009;1:18. [PubMed: 19670085]
15. Saxe R. Why and how to study Theory of Mind with fMRI. Brain Res. 2006;1079:57–65. [PubMed: 16480695]
16. Krummenacher P, Mohr C, Haker H, Brugger P. Dopamine, paranormal belief, and the detection of meaningful stimuli. J Cogn Neurosci. 2009 Jun 30; [Epub ahead of print] [PubMed: 19642883]
17. Flannelly KJ, Koenig HG, Galek K, Ellison CG. Beliefs, mental health, and evolutionary threat assessment systems in the brain. J Nerv Ment Dis. 2007;195:996–1003. [PubMed: 18091193]

Articles from Indian Journal of Psychiatry are provided here courtesy of Wolters Kluwer -- Medknow Publications

HRPacing ...


Heart Rate Pacing is a technique used to stay within ones energy reserves. The anaerobic threshold (AT) is the heart rate at which aerobic energy surges. The threshold is often around about 60% of a ones maximum heart rate, though each person is different and an individual's threshold may vary from day to day or within a day.

(Note: Maximum heart rate is 220 minus ones age. For a 50 year old, 60% of maximum heart rate is (220 - 50) x 0.6 = 102 bpm.)


* Changes colour to indicate:

- Resting - (REST) Lavender

- Recovery (RECOVER) - Green (RHR + 10%)

- Exertion (EXERT) - Orange (RHR + 20%)

- Anaerobic Threshold (AT) - Red ((220-50)x0.6)

* Set an alert based on:

- reaching Anaerobic Threshold Zone, or

- custom set Maximum Heart Rate.

* Set the Anaerobic Threshold Tolerance from 0.6 (default) to 0.5 if desired.

* Set a custom interval between alerts (15 secs default).

* Displays 12/24 hour clock based on user settings in Fitbit profile.

cognitive deficits in patients with ME/CFS …

where is the …

[give_form id="3285"]


I am gathering together a living list of people with ME

you can view the list by going to ‘ME list …’ and clicking on each initial
the list is ordered alphabetically, by christian name

you can add your name to the list by going to ‘ME lis (submission) …
and submitting your details along with an image

help me fund my ME treatment ...

... help me fund my ME treatment ...

you can choose to donate as much or as little by sliding the slider along

you can pay for the introductory workshop by donating £65

you can pay for an individual care plan by donating £71

you can pay for a monthly session by donating £71

you can pay for an individual progression plan by donating £71

you can pay for a medical review by donating £121

you can pay for a medical follow up by donating £121

you can pay for the individual assessment by donating £141

you can pay for a medical assessment by donating £187

Thank you very much !

help me fund my assessment treatments ...

... help me fund my ME treatment ...

you can choose to donate as much or as little by sliding the slider along

you can pay for a medical assessment by donating £187

you can pay for an initial assessment by donating £141

you can pay for a medical review by donating £121

Thank you very much !

help me fund my preparation for rehabilitation treatments ...

... help me fund my ME treatment ...

you can choose to donate as much or as little by sliding the slider along

you can pay for the introductory workshop by donating £65

you can pay for an individual care plan by donating £71

Thank you very much !

help me fund my rehabilitation treatments ...

... help me fund my ME treatment ...

you can choose to donate as much or as little by sliding the slider along

you can pay for a monthly session by donating £71

Thank you very much !

help me fund my follow up treatments ...

... help me fund my ME treatment ...

you can choose to donate as much or as little by sliding the slider along

you can pay for an individual progression plan by donating £71

you can pay for a medical follow up by donating £121

Thank you very much !

… duplicitous …

duplicitous …

summary of the 5 major diagnostic criteria from 1988 onwards …

summary of the 5 major diagnostic criteria from 1988 onwards …

Skip to content