uncovering ME : people we’ve lost …

I have started a 52 week course with Daily OM called A Year of Writing to Uncover the Authentic Self and I hope you will join me by reading the posts that are born from this course.

They can be found under the mind * body * soul category as a subcategory entitled ‘uncovering ME …’.

I have wanted to write my own story for such a long time and I have never done it. The reason for this I am sure will be discovered and discussed through the 52 posts to follow.

So please join me …

. . . uncovering ME . . .
. . .  people we’ve lost  . . .

introduction …

I will be using this space to free write and post my unedited thoughts, words, and scribbles. So, I am sure there may be errors that appear in the text. I do not need you to tell me about these errors as this will all be part of the process and I hope you can look past this.

people we’ve lost …

This is going to be a difficult week for many of us, and the most important thing I ask is to please be gentle on yourself as you move through it. Some of us may not be in a space where we can even begin to think about the loss of someone specific, especially if the loss is quite new. That is okay. You must honor the experience of where you are now.

This may be the most difficult week to work through in this entire course, so please go slowly and take as many breaks as you need. You may not be able to come back to it this week or even this year. Perhaps in time you can revisit this lesson and remember your cherished loved ones.

Think about ways in which your losses have changed you. Would you be the same person if you hadn’t experienced the loss?

Questions/Prompts to Guide Your Writing:

what is the first experience with grief that you remember …

Loosing my trust in men to do what is right not what they want! However, although I was strictly a child when this happened and I am now 59 years of age I still cannot address this head on.

and so my official answer is …

Loosing my first love. I thought we’d be together forever. But it wasn’t meant to be.

who is the most important person you’ve lost …

write about them … recall specific memories …

My dad is the most important person that I have lost in death. He was the one person who I knew truly truly loved me. No matter how poor my choices I always knew I could go to him without fear of being balled out or judged.

What a man he was …

is there someone you’ve lost that you’d like to write a letter to …

what would you say …

Maybe my dad or my first love. I’m not sure because with my dad there are no regrets whatsoever just everything he’s missed out on. On the other hand, everything with my first love is healed and gone now.

With the above in mind though, I have already written a letter to my mum. We had a very tricky and unresolved relationship when she was alive and so I put it all in a letter and then burned it after her funeral.

what is your most recent experience with grief …

how is it different from earlier experiences …

The loss of more of my health …

It is different in the sense that I have lost something that means I can no longer interact or engage with life; as though I were dead but I am not. However, I am not dead I am barely alive and definitely not living.

tell a favorite story about someone you’ve lost …

this does not have to be someone super close to you, though it can be …

I recall when my dad wallpapered the hallway and as soon as I walked in I noticed he’d out it on upside down. This was so my dad … he once fixed a watch but when he came to put it on the side, as fixed, he’d accidentally stuck it to his pants … he also cut out a bathroom Lino flooring the wrong way round.

there are so many more funny stories like this to tell … 

what have you gained through loss …

this may only apply if enough time has passed to give you the needed perspective …

FFS today is not the day to answer something like his … I have gained absolutely nothing …

I have gained zero …

… without health, life is not life; …
… it is only a state of languor …
… and suffering-an image of death …
… François Rabelais …

in summary & in conclusion …

Loss is difficult, especially of some Erne you truly loved and had a connection with. But from the day we’re born we know our loved ones will die.

However, loss of health is a gamble … you may … you may not … and so you have hope … once it’s gone and you have severe ME … where is the hope now …

The Essay : people we’ve lost …

I cannot help but take a rain check on this one …

sorry guys but I am too poorly right now and this will stimulate emotions that will drain me and make me even more poorly …

I may come back to this one though … so watch this space …

… the end …

Please feel free to contact me to share your outcomes or with any questions you may have.

 fragmented.ME xXx