fragmented.ME …
mind * body * soul ...

how to accept the unacceptable …

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The ideas for this post came from my ‘anaerobic threshold & ME …’ post. Which, I wrote because I wanted to learn about what my body could actually do without pushing myself into AT.

After some experiments and soul searching, I concluded that I couldn’t do much at all … and I got really stuck on how to accept this because it felt necessary but almost unacceptable at the same time.

I’m guessing that a lot of what I need to implement in relation to this acceptance stuff is probably interlinked and written about in my ‘mindfulness for ME …’ post, which I may repeat or refer to here. But I clearly need to learn this lesson or I wouldn’t still be pondering it all. I’d have it sussed and I haven’t.

It may also be that I need to use the skills that I previously talked about in my ‘mindfulness for ME …’ post in coming to terms with accepting where I am at right now.

That ascertained, this post will take you through the processes that I used as I try to accept the unacceptable …

I need, and want, to accept that I can’t do this …

 and no amount of desire or wishing is going to change my reality …

I just can’t seem to get myself around this. I understand it. I actually, even, believe it. Yet, it somehow feels like I’m accepting, whatever this may be, that this is how it will be from now on and into forever. And that is not what I want. In spite of these desires, it has now become necessary for me to ‘accept my unacceptable’.

A Striking Paradox

However, there may be other ways for me to look at this. It may not be the case that accepting the unacceptable is all negative. It’s a conceivable paradox that sometimes we need to accept the unacceptable in order to achieve the things we want to.

Let me explain by way of an illustration.

Someone is struggling daily with pain. Because of this pain, they are not enjoying life. They, in fact, believe the way they are living is not life at all.

The simple remedy might be to take pain medication.

However, for them, it’s unacceptable to take pain medications. Firstly, because psychologically it feels like failure. Secondly, and more importantly, they have an allergy to codeine, the mostly widely used medicine for moderate to severe pain levels. This leaves them believing they are in a catch 22 situation.

This said, the pain is getting in the way of their living. It stops them from enjoying things. It stops them from smiling. It exhausts them even further.

If they could just get rid of their pain, or at the very least bring the pain down to a tolerable level, then they may be able to enjoy their life and their doing of things so much more. An added bonus would also mean that they could do things without using energy on dealing with pain, meaning they may even be able to do more.

And so, to get to this point they may need to let go of their idea that relying on pain medication is failure and also go through the process of finding a medication that they are not allergic to and works for them.

acceptance has led to improved life quality, which is what they were after in the beginning …
and non-acceptance was preventing them from achieving this …

Five Ways to Acceptance

There will be many ways to reach acceptance, some more result productive than others. And they will also be personal too, what works for one may not work for another.

In my endeavour to find acceptance I have chosen to discuss the five methods that helped get me on my way to acceptance.

#1: you are enough …

I think that one of the most important steps in acceptance, of anything, but especially a life you didn’t bargain for, is to know you are enough regardless.

Y O U  A R E  E N O U G H …

You don’t have to do anything to be enough. Just being alive makes you enough and worthy enough too.

According to Dr David Hamilton being enough is tied up with self love and I have to wholeheartedly agree with him on this. In one of his articles he claims there are three stages to self-love . They are simply:

I am not enough > I’ve had enough > I am enough

I am not enough comes from comparing yourself with others, or even your former ‘well’ self. And believing that the ‘now’ you is less than the ‘former’ you, or less than the significant others you compare yourself with or to.

I’ve had enough comes when you’ve had enough of those comparisons. When you have had enough of how things are going for you. Particularly, in terms of the comparisons you make and how this stops you accepting yourself. You have had enough of seeing yourself in relation to significant others or your former ‘well’ self. You are close to acceptance because of being done with the comparison crap …

I am enough comes when you know you are enough, just as you are. In relation to acceptance, of the unacceptable, it is about not needing to pretend that you are not sick, or pretend that you are well, when you are not. It’s about your own acceptance right now that you are enough, loving yourself just as you are, with all the limitations that go with being as sick as you are right now. And not caring what anyone else thinks. Authentically loving and accepting YOU…

#2 the solution is in the problem …

When you have unlimited resources the solution to a problem can seem relatively easy but the results will often be over thought, over costed, over spent, and over engineered. However, when resources are limited the solution is usually more elegant and refined.

In relation to acceptance, instead of looking outside of yourself for the answers, you only have yourself. Only you really knows how you feel and where you are in relation to what you can or cannot accept. Your resources are limited. Stay close to your inner self while you investigate what’s actually going on with your acceptance. Be curious and be open when you ask yourself questions. Such as, ‘what’s really going on here’, ‘what am I avoiding’, ‘how do I really feel about this’. Lots of other probing questions will follow and you will take yourself on your own personal journey. So it’s important that you don’t look to somebody else for the answers, or the questions, but to within yourself.

Ultimately, this leads to seeing deeper into ourselves, which results in a kinder understanding of why we are like we are. Why we hold ourselves to such high standards. Usually, higher standards and expectations than we hold others to.

As we get to know ourselves on a deeper level the right solution for us will appear from out of the problem if we can be still and enquiring.

Below is an exercise I found online to help you in this regard:

  • Sit quietly where you cannot be disturbed.
  • Put your attention on something you are resisting and say to yourself: “Just for this moment I will accept that this unacceptable situation is in my life and let it be here”.
  • Allow yourself to experience everything about this situation. Let in fully all the feelings, worries, fears, future disastrous visions, etc and all the related sensations in your body.
  • The feelings will grow. Let them. If you feel afraid, be afraid. If you feel angry, be angry. If you feel sad, cry. Have the courage to face what you cannot accept. Let the experience build. What you will notice is that it will eventually reach a climax and then it will all start to subside.
  • As this happens there may be a shift. I call this the “Soul-shift” where a deeper aspect of your being starts to engage. A vague sense of calmness begins to develop. You open up to a deeper sense of knowing. You may see something in the problem that you did not see before that was hidden underneath the stuff you didn’t want to see. Now you see it and it presents a possible solution to the problem.
  • Another thing that may happen is a “Turn around”. Gradually your attention goes off the problem and switches to a goal. You start thinking of what you want instead of what you don’t want. You start to imagine finding the job you do want or the kind of relationship you prefer with your partner. You think about what you can do to make that happen.

I find this exercise difficult to succumb to but when I do the relief afterwards is immense.

#3: acceptance …

We often, myself included, have this idea that if we accept something then we are saying that things won’t ever change and that this is how they will be for the rest of our lives. And so we resist with everything we have in order to not resign ourselves to accepting that this is how it will always be.

#3.a: in the here and now …

However, another way of looking at this could be by simply accepting, in the here and now; just for the moment. Rather than our ‘acceptance’ meaning we accept forever, it can mean just for now and nothing more. One moment at a time.

#3.b: for the future …

In fact, things could very well be much different in the future. One thing we all know for sure is that nothing stays the same, everything changes and moves on.

#3.c: radical acceptance …

Another way to approach this can be by using the technique of radical acceptance. Radical acceptance is when you stop fighting reality, you stop responding with impulsive or destructive behaviors when things aren’t going the way you want them to, instead you let go of bitterness that may be keeping you trapped in a cycle of suffering.

Research shows that we cause ourselves more emotional pain and suffering when we rail against situations and / or people that are beyond our control. Still, all pain can’t be avoided. And while radical acceptance suggests letting go somewhat, it doesn’t support the notion that a difficult reality or relationship is OK, including situations or relationships that are hurtful and destructive.

Practicing these ten ways to radical acceptance can help in this.

… it is what it is …
#4: what you resist will persist …

Carl Jung contended that ‘what you resist not only persists, but will grow in size.’ Yet, when we feel pain, emotional or otherwise, our natural instinct is to resist it. And there is much evidence to support the idea that, what you resist will persist.

Research has shown that those with chronic pain, who resist their pain, actually create more pain through muscle contraction … and in a similar way resisting our situation may actually reinforce it. Showing that what we resist persist.

#5: what you accept promotes healing …

On the other hand, those chronic pain sufferers who learned how to let go of, or simply accept, their pain actually reduced it by up to 57% with some even healing the pain condition.

They did this by means of meditation, which I have discussed previously in my of ‘mindfulness for ME …’ page.

What happens is that when we accept the unacceptable then our brain subconsciously starts to work on solutions to the problem(s) and opens up to find meaning for the suffering. Consequently, offering us another perspective on the matter, which ultimately equates to acceptance.

In Summary & In Conclusion

Acceptance, for me, has to begin with accepting that first and foremost:

I  a m  e n o u g h

Furthermore, key to acceptance also involves radically accepting that:

i t  i s  w h a t  i t  i s

w h a t  y o u  r e s i s t  w i l l  p e r s i s t

w h a t  y o u  a c c e p t  p r o m o t e s  h e a l i n g

Therefore, in order to accept the unacceptable we must first get to the belief that WE ARE ENOUGH. Then we can begin the real work, moment by moment, with inquisitive and kindly inward questioning, which will almost certainly lead us to a different perspective on our situation.

One that allows us to be able to accept that it is ok to not want to have the illness we have, or to not want be in pain day after day. And to be ok with that is acceptance and can release energy reserves for doing other stuff, or even for healing.

On the other hand, non-acceptance is actually preventing us from achieving the things we do want?

That is a pretty amazing paradox.

Therefore, the above methods can also be your gateway to acceptance of things as they are. They can be used separately or together, depending on what you need or what you find beneficial at any particular time.

They have helped me loads and I believe they can help you too. You just need to given them a go and feel free to contact me to share your outcomes or with any questions you may have.

 fragmented.ME xXx

Last Updated on 12/05/2022 by fragmented_ME

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My birth name is Denise, but I’m know as Bella to those who love me. I have a first class honours degree in education & psychology and a strong passion to keep learning and educating others ... I have severe ME/CFS and lots of other chronic illnesses and I started this blog as an expansion to my instagram page, where I advocate for chronic illness. I am married and have two grown up boys, or should I say young men. I have three gorgeous grandchildren, one boy and two girls. And despite being chronically sick and housebound I am mostly happy. 🥰

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10 steps to practicing Radical Acceptance
according to DBT’s founder, Marsha Linehan:


1.  Observe that you are questioning or fighting reality (“it shouldn’t be this way”)

2.  Remind yourself that the unpleasant reality is just as it is and cannot be changed (“this is what happened”)

3.  Remind yourself that there are causes for the reality (“this is how things happened”)

4.  Practice accepting with your whole self (mind, body, spirit) - Use accepting self-talk, relaxation techniques, mindfulness and/or imagery

5.  List all of the behaviors you would engage in if you did accept the facts and then engage in those behaviors as if you have already accepted the facts

6.  Imagine, in your mind’s eye, believing what you do not want to accept and rehearse in your mind what you would do if you accepted what seems unacceptable

7.  Attend to body sensations as you think about what you need to accept

8.  Allow disappointment, sadness or grief to arise within you

9.  Acknowledge that life can be worth living even when there is pain

10.  Do pros and cons if you find yourself resisting practicing acceptance

Logo of ijpsych

2009 Oct-Dec; 51(4): 239–241.
doi: 10.4103/0019-5545.58285: 10.4103/0019-5545.58285
PMCID: PMC2802367
PMID: 20048445

The biochemistry of belief

Address for correspondence: Dr. TS Sathyanarayana Rao, Department of Psychiatry, JSS University, JSS Medical College Hospital, M.G. Road, Mysore - 570 004, India. E-mail: moc.oohay@91oarsst
This is an open-access article distributed under the terms of the Creative Commons Attribution License, which permits unrestricted use, distribution, and reproduction in any medium, provided the original work is properly cited.

“Man is what he believes”

Anton Chekhov

Beliefs are basically the guiding principles in life that provide direction and meaning in life. Beliefs are the preset, organized filters to our perceptions of the world (external and internal). Beliefs are like ‘Internal commands’ to the brain as to how to represent what is happening, when we congruently believe something to be true. In the absence of beliefs or inability to tap into them, people feel disempowered.

Beliefs originate from what we hear - and keep on hearing from others, ever since we were children (and even before that!). The sources of beliefs include environment, events, knowledge, past experiences, visualization etc. One of the biggest misconceptions people often harbor is that belief is a static, intellectual concept. Nothing can be farther from truth! Beliefs are a choice. We have the power to choose our beliefs. Our beliefs become our reality.

Beliefs are not just cold mental premises, but are ‘hot stuff’ intertwined with emotions (conscious or unconscious). Perhaps, that is why we feel threatened or react with sometimes uncalled for aggression, when we believe our beliefs are being challenged! Research findings have repeatedly pointed out that the emotional brain is no longer confined to the classical locales of the hippocampus, amygdala and hypothalamus.[1] The sensory inputs we receive from the environment undergo a filtering process as they travel across one or more synapses, ultimately reaching the area of higher processing, like the frontal lobes. There, the sensory information enters our conscious awareness. What portion of this sensory information enters is determined by our beliefs. Fortunately for us, receptors on the cell membranes are flexible, which can alter in sensitivity and conformation. In other words, even when we feel stuck ‘emotionally’, there is always a biochemical potential for change and possible growth. When we choose to change our thoughts (bursts of neurochemicals!), we become open and receptive to other pieces of sensory information hitherto blocked by our beliefs! When we change our thinking, we change our beliefs. When we change our beliefs, we change our behavior.

A mention of the ‘Placebo’ is most appropriate at this juncture. Medical history is replete with numerous reported cases where placebos were found to have a profound effect on a variety of disorders. One such astounding case was that of a woman suffering from severe nausea and vomiting. Objective measurements of her gastric contractions indicated a disrupted pattern matching the condition she complained of. Then a ‘new, magical, extremely potent’ drug was offered to her, which would, the doctors proclaimed, undoubtedly cure her nausea. Within a few minutes, her nausea vanished! The very same gastric tests now revealed normal pattern, when, in actuality, she had been given syrup of ipecac, a substance usually used to induce nausea! When the syrup was presented to her, paired with the strong suggestion of relief of nausea, by an authority figure, it acted as a (command) message to the brain that triggered a cascade of self-regulatory biochemical responses within the body.[2] This instance dramatically demonstrates that the influence of placebo could be more potent than expected drug effect.

An important observation was that, part of the placebo response seemed to involve the meaning of the disorder or the illness to the individual. In other words, the person's belief or how she/he interprets (inter-presents or internally represents) directly governs the biological response or behavior. Another remarkable study involved a schizophrenic. This woman was observed to have split personality. Under normal conditions, her blood glucose levels were normal. However, the moment she believed she was diabetic, her entire physiology changed to become that of a diabetic, including elevated blood glucose levels.[3]

Suggestions or symbolic messages shape beliefs that in turn affect our physical well being. Several cases of ‘Disappearance of warts’ have been reported by Ornstein and Sobel wherein they ponder on how the brain translates the suggestions (sometimes using hypnosis) into systematic biochemical battle strategies such as chemical messengers sent to enlist the aid of immune cells in an assault on the microbe-induced miniature tumor or probably small arteries are selectively constricted, cutting off the vital nutrient supply to warts but not touching the neighboring healthy cells.[2]

Findings of carefully designed research indicate that our interpretation of what we are seeing (experiencing) can literally alter our physiology. In fact, all symptoms of medicine work through our beliefs. By subtly transforming the unknown (disease/disorder) into something known, named, tamed and explained, alarm reactions in the brain can be calmed down. All therapies have a hidden, symbolic value and influence on the psyche, besides the direct specific effect they may have on the body.

Just as amazingly life-affirming placebos are, the reverse, “Nocebo' has been observed to be playing its part too. It is associated with negative, life-threatening or disempowering beliefs. Arthur Barsky, a psychiatrist states that it is the patient's expectations – beliefs whether a drug or procedure works or will have side effects – that plays a crucial role in the outcome.[4]

The biochemistry of our body stems from our awareness.[5] Belief-reinforced awareness becomes our biochemistry. Each and every tiny cell in our body is perfectly and absolutely aware of our thoughts, feelings and of course, our beliefs. There is a beautiful saying ‘Nobody grows old. When people stop growing, they become old’. If you believe you are fragile, the biochemistry of your body unquestionably obeys and manifests it. If you believe you are tough (irrespective of your weight and bone density!), your body undeniably mirrors it. When you believe you are depressed (more precisely, when you become consciously aware of your ‘Being depressed’), you stamp the raw data received through your sense organs, with a judgment – that is your personal view – and physically become the ‘interpretation’ as you internalize it. A classic example is ‘Psychosocial dwarfism’, wherein children who feel and believethat they are unloved, translate the perceived lack of love into depleted levels of growth hormone, in contrast to the strongly held view that growth hormone is released according to a preprogrammed schedule coded into the individual's genes!

Providing scientific evidence to support a holistic approach to well being and healthcare, Bruce Lipton sheds light on mechanism underlying healing at cellular level. He emphasizes that ‘love’ is the most healing emotion and ‘placebo’ effect accounts for a substantial percentage of any drug's action, underscoring the significance of beliefs in health and sickness. According to him, as adults, we still believe in and act our lives out based on information we absorbed as children (pathetic indeed!). And the good news is, we can do something about the ‘tape’ our subconscious mind is playing (ol' silly beliefs) and change them NOW.[6] Further recent literature evidences provided knowledge based on scientific principles of biology of belief. There are limited studies on clinics of traditional beliefs and if we get more scientific data, we can use these traditional systems in clinical mental health management. Human belief system is formed by all the experiences learned and experimented filtered through personality.[7] The senses to capture inner and outer perceptions have higher brain potentials. Some questions that arise in this context are, does the integration and acceptance of these perceptions result in the establishment of beliefs? Does the establishment of these beliefs depend on proof demonstrations? The proofs might be the perceptions, which we can directly see or having scientific proof or custom or faith.[8,9] Beliefs are developed as stimuli received as trusted information and stored in the memory. These perceptions are generalized and established into belief. These beliefs are involved in the moral judgment of the person. Beliefs help in decision-making. Bogousslavsky and Inglin explained that, how some physicians were more successful by taking an account of patient beliefs. Beliefs influence factors involved in the development of psychopathology. They also influence the cognitive and emotional assessment, addictiveness, responses to false positives and persistent normal defensive reactions. Total brain function is required in stabilizing the belief and in responding to environmental system. Some of the brain regions and the neural circuits are very important in establishing beliefs and executing emotions. Frontal lobes play a major role in beliefs. Mental representations of the world are integrated with sub-cortical information by prefrontal cortex. Amygdala and Hippocampus are involved in the process of thinking and thus help in execution of beliefs. NMDA receptor is involved in thinking and in the development of beliefs. These beliefs are subjected to challenge. A belief that is subjected to more challenges becomes stronger. When a new stimulus comes, it creates distress in the brain with already existing patterns. The distress results in the release of dopamine (neurotransmitter) to transmit the signal.[10,11] Research findings of Young and Saxe (2008) revealed that medial prefrontal cortex is involved in processing the belief valence.[12] Right temporoparietal junction and precuneus are involved in the processing of beliefs to moral judgment. True beliefs are processed through right temporoparietal junction.[13,14] Saxe (2006) explained that beliefs judging starts at the age of five years citing example of judging of belief questions on short stories by the children.[15] Belief attribution involved activating regions of medial prefrontal cortex, superior temporal gyri and hippocampal regions. Studies by Krummenacher et al, have shown that dopamine levels are associated with paranormal thoughts suggesting the role of dopamine in belief development in the brain.[16] Flannelly et al, illustrated on how primitive brain mechanisms that evolved to assess environmental threats in related psychiatric disorders.[17] Also were highlighted the issues such as the way beliefs can affect psychiatric symptoms through these brain systems. The theories discussed widely are related to (a) link psychiatric disorders to threat assessment and (b) explain how the normal functioning of threat assessment systems can become pathological. It is proposed that three brain structures are implicated in brain disorders in response to threat assessment and self-defense: the regions are the prefrontal cortex, the basal ganglia and parts of limbic system. The functionality of these regions has great potential to understand mechanism of belief formation and its relevance in neurological functions/dysfunctions. Now it is clear that biology and physiology of belief is an open area for research both at basic and clinical level. The future directions are to develop validated experimental or sound theoretical interpretation to make ‘BELIEF’ as a potential clinical management tool.

Perceptual shifts are the prerequisites for changing the belief and hence changing the biochemistry of our body favorably. Our innate desire and willingness to learn and grow lead to newer perceptions. When we consciously allow newer perceptions to enter the brain by seeking new experiences, learning new skills and changed perspectives, our body can respond in newer ways –this is the true secret of youth. Beliefs (internal representations/interpretations) thus hold the magic wand of remarkable transformations in our biochemical profile. If you are chasing joy and peace all the time everywhere but exclaim exhausted, ‘Oh, it's to be found nowhere!’, why not change your interpretation of NOWHERE to ‘NOW HERE’; just by introducing a gap, you change your awareness – that changes your belief and that changes your biochemistry in an instant!

Everything exists as a ‘Matrix of pure possibilities’ akin to ‘formless’ molten wax or moldable soft clay. We shape them into anything we desire by choosing to do so, prompted, dictated (consciously or unconsciously) by our beliefs. The awareness that we are part of these ever-changing fields of energy that constantly interact with one another is what gives us the key hitherto elusive, to unlock the immense power within us. And it is our awareness of this awesome truth that changes everything. Then we transform ourselves from passive onlookers to powerful creators. Our beliefs provide the script to write or re-write the code of our reality.

Thoughts and beliefs are an integral part of the brain's operations. Neurotransmitters could be termed the ‘words’ brain uses to communicate with exchange of information occurring constantly, mediated by these molecular messengers. Unraveling the mystery of this molecular music induced by the magic of beliefs, dramatically influencing the biochemistry of brain could be an exciting adventure and a worth pursuing cerebral challenge.


1. Candace Pert. Molecules of emotion: Why you feel the way you feel. New York, USA: Scribner Publications; 2003. ISBN-10: 0684846349.
2. Ornstein R, Sobel D. The healing brain: Breakthrough discoveries about how the brain keeps us healthy. USA: Malor Books; 1999. ISBN-10: 1883536170.
3. Robbins A. Unlimited power: The new science of personal excellence. UK: Simon and Schuster; 1986. ISBN 0-7434-0939-6.
4. Braden G. The spontaneous healing of belief. Hay House Publishers (India) Pvt. Ltd; 2008. ISBN 978-81-89988-39-5.
5. Chopra D. Ageless body, timeless mind: The quantum alternative to growing old. Hormony Publishers; 1994. ISBN -10: 0517882124.
6. Lipton B. The biology of belief: Unleashing the power of consciousness, matter and miracles. Mountain of Love Publishers; 2005. ISBN 978-0975991473.
7. Bogousslavsky J, Inglin M. Beliefs and the brain. Eur Neurol. 2007;58:129–32. [PubMed: 17622716]
8. Gundersen L. Faith and healing. Ann Intern Med. 2000;132:169–72. [PubMed: 10644287]
9. Mueller PS, Plevak DJ, Rummans TA. Religious involvement, spirituality, and medicine: Implications for clinical practice. Mayo Clin Proc. 2001;76:1225–35. [PubMed: 11761504]
10. Patel AD, Peretz I, Tramo M, Labreque R. Processing prosodic and musical patterns: A neuropsychological investigation. Brain Lang. 1998;61:123–44. [PubMed: 9448936]
11. Tramo MJ. Biology and music. Music of the hemispheres. Science. 2001;291:54–6. [PubMed: 11192009]
12. Young L, Saxe R. The neural basis of belief encoding and integration in moral judgment. Neuroimage. 2008;40:1912–20. [PubMed: 18342544]
13. Aichhorn M, Perner J, Weiss B, Kronbichler M, Staffen W, Ladurner G. Temporo-parietal junction activity in theory-of-mind tasks: Falseness, beliefs, or attention. J Cogn Neurosci. 2009;21:1179–92. [PubMed: 18702587]
14. Abraham A, Rakoczy H, Werning M, von Cramon DY, Schubotz RI. Matching mind to world and vice versa: Functional dissociations between belief and desire mental state processing. Soc Neurosci. 2009;1:18. [PubMed: 19670085]
15. Saxe R. Why and how to study Theory of Mind with fMRI. Brain Res. 2006;1079:57–65. [PubMed: 16480695]
16. Krummenacher P, Mohr C, Haker H, Brugger P. Dopamine, paranormal belief, and the detection of meaningful stimuli. J Cogn Neurosci. 2009 Jun 30; [Epub ahead of print] [PubMed: 19642883]
17. Flannelly KJ, Koenig HG, Galek K, Ellison CG. Beliefs, mental health, and evolutionary threat assessment systems in the brain. J Nerv Ment Dis. 2007;195:996–1003. [PubMed: 18091193]

Articles from Indian Journal of Psychiatry are provided here courtesy of Wolters Kluwer -- Medknow Publications

HRPacing ...


Heart Rate Pacing is a technique used to stay within ones energy reserves. The anaerobic threshold (AT) is the heart rate at which aerobic energy surges. The threshold is often around about 60% of a ones maximum heart rate, though each person is different and an individual's threshold may vary from day to day or within a day.

(Note: Maximum heart rate is 220 minus ones age. For a 50 year old, 60% of maximum heart rate is (220 - 50) x 0.6 = 102 bpm.)


* Changes colour to indicate:

- Resting - (REST) Lavender

- Recovery (RECOVER) - Green (RHR + 10%)

- Exertion (EXERT) - Orange (RHR + 20%)

- Anaerobic Threshold (AT) - Red ((220-50)x0.6)

* Set an alert based on:

- reaching Anaerobic Threshold Zone, or

- custom set Maximum Heart Rate.

* Set the Anaerobic Threshold Tolerance from 0.6 (default) to 0.5 if desired.

* Set a custom interval between alerts (15 secs default).

* Displays 12/24 hour clock based on user settings in Fitbit profile.

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… duplicitous …

duplicitous …

summary of the 5 major diagnostic criteria from 1988 onwards …

summary of the 5 major diagnostic criteria from 1988 onwards …

10 steps to practicing Radical Acceptance
according to DBT’s founder, Marsha Linehan:


1.  Observe that you are questioning or fighting reality (“it shouldn’t be this way”)

2.  Remind yourself that the unpleasant reality is just as it is and cannot be changed (“this is what happened”)

3.  Remind yourself that there are causes for the reality (“this is how things happened”)

4.  Practice accepting with your whole self (mind, body, spirit) - Use accepting self-talk, relaxation techniques, mindfulness and/or imagery

5.  List all of the behaviors you would engage in if you did accept the facts and then engage in those behaviors as if you have already accepted the facts

6.  Imagine, in your mind’s eye, believing what you do not want to accept and rehearse in your mind what you would do if you accepted what seems unacceptable

7.  Attend to body sensations as you think about what you need to accept

8.  Allow disappointment, sadness or grief to arise within you

9.  Acknowledge that life can be worth living even when there is pain

10.  Do pros and cons if you find yourself resisting practicing acceptance

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